Erik's Playhouse
by S. A. Dickon
Summary: A parody of Peewee's playhouse, with your favorite phantom and mine, Erik!


(Disclaimer) I do not own _The_ Phantom of the Opera, or _the_ Peewee's Playhouse, but I do own _a _phantom, and _a _playhouse- well not really.

**Erik's Playhouse: Episode 1**

Erik was sitting on sweet music's throne. His back hunched over, and his fingers lightly stroking his beloved organ…

And then…

_Come on in, take yourself a boat!_

'_Cuz you've entered a place where anything can happen!_

_We've got a really human cat,_

_And an annoying Persian guy,_

_Because this is the place to get composing,_

_To be obsessive, _

'_Cuz everything is Coo-Coo,_

_At Erik's Playhouse!_

"Good evening, Mademoiselles, and Masseurs, today I will be teaching you on Love and Los-" 

"Like the T.V. show?" the sirens questioned, in perfect harmony.

"No, like-" Erik stopped, dumbstruck, as he saw ripples across the lake.

"It's the most beautiful girl in all of Paris! Cooed the sirens "Christine Daa'e!"

"Salutations everyone!" greeted Christine as she cautiously stepped out of the boat.

"Salutations!" echoed the Sirens as they plunged deep, back into the lake.

"I see you haven't fixed the walls yet!" nagged Christine.

"The walls, my angel?"

"Yes! They spoke again! You said you were going to call someone and fix them!"

"Oh, of course, and-here he is now!"

Enters Persian

"Evening Erik!" The Persian smiled, then upon seeing Christine-"SO! You've kidnapped Msll. Daa'e again!" Erik had to hand it to the Persian, he certainly was observant, if not totally………..stupid.

"Err, no" mumbled Erik, _"I am so sick of him!"_ he thought.

"Well, you haven't messed up yet, but when you do I'll be there, and until there I'll be here! Watching and watching, waiting and waiting, as only a Persian of my caliber would-"

"To what reason?" interrupted Erik, "Do I owe this pleasure, my dear Deroga?" This last phrase was spat with so much spite and evil-dooingess as only a phantom could perform, a phantom of an opera.

"Oh, that's right!" The Persian answered cheerfully, "Your mails here!" "And I'm on to you Erik!" he added, as he slunk back to whatever it is he does. (Which consisted of him spying through the doorway.)

"I can see that, especially sense you have taken the liberty of "perforating" my mail, thank you."

"Well," came the voice of the Deroga, "You could have already won 10,000 doll-"

SLAM

"Note to self" Erik mumbled as he flipped through the mail, "Get more doors to slam in Persians face."

Erik suddenly remembered about Christine

"Oh, Christine" he called. "Christine, what are you doing!"

"Just checking the walls, just checking the walls!" she shouted hysterically, as she continued "feeling up" the walls.

"_Ewwww" _thought Erik. "_Well, at least its good practice for when-"_

"Why are you suddenly blushing?"

But Before Erik could answerer, (thank god), The Sirens appeared, coincidently just behind Christine. "The King of Fops is coming" they uttered effortlessly, and just when Christine glanced behind, they were gone.

Erik looked across the lake- he saw nothing. He looked at the Persians Doorway, (as he now saw fit to call it), he saw nothing.

Christine looked in the Chandelier shaped cookie jar, and sadly, she saw nothing.

Erik heard a gurgling noise, he paused. The Phantom put a hand to his ear, and he did indeed hear a gurgling sound. It started in low, and then it started to grow! As he looked down once more at the lake he saw-

Bubbles-

_Moving _bubbles-

And these _moving_ bubbles were coming closer to the shore. More importantly, to Erik's nicley polished shoes/feet-but it was too late.

SPLASH

"Surprise!" half shouted, half gurgled Raoul as he sprang out of the knee-deep water.

Erik stood for a moment or two, he was now soaking wet from mask to his polished shoes/feet. He stood, and looked, as one might say, as meditating, or in a critical meeting with Mr. Shoulder Devil and Mr. Shoulder Angel.

Mr. Shoulder Angel was up by 2 in the 4th quarter, with 20 seconds left. But, Mr. Shoulder Devil kicked a field goal-then went on to do some other point scoring activities, until the end score was 10-48, a true Saints score.

He reached for his Punjab, but when he looked at the incoherent King of the Fops splashing and playing in what probably was his own waste-Erik stood strait up, shoulders back, head held up high, and just as he was about to put away his Punjab-

"Finally!" yelled the Persian, "I've got you right where I want-"

click The Punjab was now neatly tucked away.

"For what, prey tell, Deroga?" replied Erik as he twirled and swooshed his cape around to meet the Deroga.

"The Word of the Day of course!"

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH" everyone (including the Persian) stated.

"Which is…um….Perfidious!"

"Perfidious!"

"Perfidious?"

"Pea-nuts!"

"Eh-hem" interrupted the Persian-who was enjoying the moment a little too much-"According to Merriam Webster…

…Of, relating too, or characterized by Perfidy."

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!"

"Pshshshshss, I knew that!" Pshshshed Erik.

"Of course" agreed Christine.

"Pea-nuts!" shouted Raoul.

"You know, I have often wondered how those "cirques pea-nut" candies ever got off the cutting room floor." Mussed Erik to no one in particular…

"So, that's his plan, eh? To use these Cirques Pea-Nuts?" thought the Persian, unfortunatly he thought this aloud, hence the non-itallics.

Punjab

Credits

Hope you all enjoyed it. I hope to make this an actual series-like type thing, but who knows. Anyway, the first episodes are not always as good as the rest of the series, and they won't be unless you review! And tell me what you think! Also, I want to thank someone for this characterization of the Persian, but I forgot whom, so, thank you! For now, and I will credit you as soon as I find/remember who you were/are!

Thanks!


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